7 Big Parenting Mistakes

(Besides the funny hat.)

Here’s a short list of mistakes that all parents can make when it comes to seeing, understanding, and biblically responding to the spiritual growing pains of life. (This is as much to myself as to others.) Stop and think about it—and pray for godly wisdom in responding to the issues of your children’s heart with proper compassion, authority, and biblical instruction.

Too often, when our kids struggle, this is our reaction:

1. Denial – denying issues or naively thinking that there aren’t any issues to deal with.

2. Embarrassment – hoping others don’t find out about an issue—which causes me to not seek help or counsel.

3. Defensiveness – taking offense at someone’s attempt to deal with an issue, or allowing my child to avoid personal responsibility by blaming others.

4. Unresponsiveness – knowing there’s an issue but hoping it will just go away on its own (you know—a phase.)

5. Weariness – knowing there’s an issue, but being too tired to respond, or becoming discouraged that nothing I’ve tried appears to be working.

6. Duplicity – not wanting to deal with my own issue, and thus, creating an allowance for my child’s.

7. Over-reaction – blowing up over the issue rather than contexualizing it biblically and responding appropriately.

The answers: 1. Expect your kids to struggle. 2. And since everybody’s kids struggle, don’t be embarrassed when they do. 3. Be supportive when another authority loves your child enough to help—even if the child whines about it. 4. Don’t expect issues to disappear, they usually get worse. (See this article about passive parenting.) 5. No matter how tired or discouraged you are, don’t stop doing the right things—like praying and laboring. 6. Be willing to examine your own heart first so you can authentically help your child. 7. Put every issue into the context of obeying and honoring God, and respond in that light.

Let’s face it, our best parenting skills cannot cover for the fact that we’re human! We all have blind spots. And our children all have an enemy who is targeting them. Every kid has issues and every parent is called of God to biblically nurture and lead through those issues. Expect the enemy to come after your kids—and ask God for wisdom in strength to do the right thing when he does.

“…bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” Ephesians 6:4

Thanks to www.caryschmidt.com!

25 Ways to Kill Your Marriage

1. Demand that your spouse meets your needs.

2. Pout when you don't get your way.

3. Use the silent treatment when you are mad.

4. Always put yourself first.

5. Be critical.

6. Tell your spouse they need to change, but you make no effort to change.

7. Ignore your spouses needs.

8. Make no effort to improve yourself or your marriage.

9. Never compliment your spouse.

10. Speak negatively about your spouse around other people.

11. Make no effort to keep yourself "looking good" for your spouse.

12. Use derogatory names like stupid, dumb, ignorant and idiot.

13. Always blame your spouse for the problems. It's never your fault.

14. Take your mate for granted.

15. Quit trying to impress your spouse (you're married, it's not needed anymore).

16. Withhold sex to punish your spouse.

17. Never take any time to get away without the kids.

18. When arguing ... bring up old stuff from the past.

19. Have a short fuse.

20. When angry be verbally abusive.

21. Never seek outside help when you come to an impasse.

22. Don't tell your spouse how much you love or appreciate them. Just expect them to know it.

23. Have a "it's my way or the highway" attitude.

24. Spend more time with your friends than your spouse.

25. Never say "I love you."

Thanks again to www.treymorgan.net!